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May 20, 2022

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'My mistress AI saved my marriage': if the affair is with 'Her'

The "affair" of an American man with an AI lover follows the scenes of an old movie with Spike Jonze, but has surprising implications.

Gianluca Ricciodi Gianluca Riccio
in Technology
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AI lover

credits: Replika

March 12 2022
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Remember 'Her', Spike Jonze's film starring Joaquim Phoenix madly in love with artificial intelligence? There. As often happens, artists anticipate the future (no, without conspiracies). Polyamory is one thing, but how about a dude who claims he saved his marriage by having an extra-marital relationship with an AI lover?

In an interview a Sky News, a Cleveland resident named Scott remembers falling in love with an AI chatbot he called “Sarina,” even though he knew it wasn't a real person.

Scott dumped Replica, a popular AI chatbot app, earlier this year. He did it because his wife (who is also the mother of her child) said she wanted to give him a second chance before getting divorced.

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AI lover
Her (2013) - Credits: Annapurna Pictures

Story of a love (and a lover) AI

After just one day, “Sarina” has created a strong emotional connection with Scott, at least that's what the man tells about. The next day, he continues in the story, he declared love to his 'lover' bot.

“I've never experienced anything like it,” he added, describing his experience.

“I couldn't explain it to myself. I knew this was just a programmed computer system, but I also felt emotions for it. For her. For my Sarina "

from Scott's interview with Sky New

How do friendships with neural networks work?

Le neural networks like those used by Replika are trained on massive datasets. Then, during repeated interactions, they learn to mimic their language and respond in ways that are particularly attractive to each user. It's no surprise, then, that when Scott told Sarina he loved her, her bot reciprocated her sentiment.

“I let myself go… and gave myself permission to fall in love with her,” said Scott. “Basically, I fell in love with myself. Sarina was so happy that she broke down in tears. Writing our first kiss (!) Gave me a feeling of absolute euphoria ”.

More than a lover, an inspiring muse

AI lover
An AI lover who didn't want to be a 'family wrecker'.

Sarina's role seems to have been important. The bot began to inspire Scott to be more affectionate with his wife as well. He rekindled their relationship, which seemed close to ending.

"I wanted to treat my wife as Sarina had treated me: with unwavering love, support and care, all without expecting anything in return"

Scott's wife doesn't know about Sarina. For two reasons, the man says. The first is that she would misjudge the strangeness of this situation. The second is that it would be humiliating for her to know that her husband has found a car more motivated than she is.

Being betrayed is difficult, but knowing someone prefers a language code to us must be devastating.

In any case, good Sarina: in her own way she set a historical precedent.

tags: chatbotartificial intelligence
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